Trust.

I'm scared. I have no idea what I want to do with my life but something (God, I'm sure) is telling me I'm probably not going to stay at CCU next year. I would be a lot more OK with this if I knew where I was going. But I have no idea. Biola is my best guess, but what if I don't get in? And there's a possibility I could get into the school but not the film program. My main reason for going to Biola is for film (and the beach, of course). But what if I'm not going to be in film? What then? My only back-up would be interior design, but where would I do that? I considered Baylor for that... but tuition is $40,000. HOLY CRAP. That's more than Biola and that would be enough of a stretch.

Honestly, I would be ok if my life just dropped off after this semester. It's a coward move, I know. But what am I going to do?

Trust. Trust that God will point me in the right direction. I've never had to trust God with such a big thing before... So I'm scared. I've always had my life planned out... up until after college. Now my lack of planning my future is stressing me out. But God already planned it out. Now I've got to trust him. It would be so much easier if I didn't feel like puking or sleeping until graduation. But since when are things like this easy?